Cliche (God is Our Shepherd)

It's been a while since I've written anything on here.  That's because I haven't felt like I had anything to say.  As I've expressed before, the only intended reader of this blog is myself, so each word I write is written to me.  

I want to say that times are hard these days.  I think in some circles I could get away with saying that.  I'm unemployed, broke, and have monthly expenses that need to be paid.  But does that mean times are hard?  I often feel I am under attack from Satan, getting pelted by his anxiety-tipped arrows of doubt and despair.  But when I take a step back and examine the bigger picture, I notice that God is there.  I turn around and see that week by week, month by month, God has provided for each bill, each expense and it gives me joy.  Psalm 94:18+19 says, "When I said, 'My foot is slipping,' your love, O LORD, supported me.   When anxiety was great within me, your consolation brought joy to my soul."  

I'm learning what it means to have God as my shepherd.  Ezekiel 34:31 says, "You my sheep, the sheep of my pasture, are people, and I am your God, declares the Sovereign LORD."  When Jesus came as a man he reiterated this in John 10:14, "I am the good shepherd; I know my sheep and my sheep know me." 

God as my shepherd is another one of those Christianese analogies that lost its meaning to me for a while.  Probably because I didn't really need a shepherd, or at least thought I didn't.  It gives me such peace knowing that God cares me for like one in his flock.  Jesus said that if only one of his sheep goes missing, he will leave all the rest behind and go find it.  He gave his life for his sheep.  He knows his sheep by name, and his sheep now his voice.  It is a close relationship, a shepherd to his sheep.  A shepherd's main job is to see that his flock is cared for, that every need is met.  "For he is our God and we are the people of his pasture, the flock under his care," Psalm 95:7. 

This leads to another big lesson I am learning, and another one of those Christian-isms that I had grown up with.  "God will meet all of my needs, but not all of my wants."  It's been said so much that it is just barely hanging on for meaning, but it is so true.  I can bank on God providing for me.  I have a list of past experiences where I've seen it first hand.  But it has rarely left me with any extra.  My cup rarely "runneth over."  However, it is producing character in me.  I am finding that I am, in fact, content with not having much. 

To say I am "suffering" right now is too overdramatic, but I can relate to this passage in Romans 5.  "We also rejoice in our sufferings, because we know that suffering produces perseverance; perseverance, character; and character, hope. And hope does not disappoint us, because God has poured out his love into our hearts by the Holy Spirit, whom he has given us."  I am learning to persevere.  Resilience is the name of the game.  I've quoted this verse several times, "We are hard pressed on every side, but not crushed (2 Corinthians 4:8)."  

Life is bigger than me and my little problems.  But that doesn't mean God doesn't care about the tough things I deal with.  The book of Psalms contains more songs of lament than anything else.  John Ortberg suggests that it is because the Israelites believed God took a personal interest in their problems. The bible says to not be unsettled in your trials because we know quite well we are destined for them.  God is bigger and He takes a personal interest in us.